Everyone struggles with it, but women more than men..and obviously I have been there first hand as a girl and a woman.
First, let’s talk about this outfit. I love styling heels and nice shorts together for the summer. I paired the shorts with a simple yellow, sleeveless top, and a relaxed black blazer to go over it all (my favorite is from Topshop). This is a simple cool outfit for the summer that still looks business casual or like you are ready for a night out.
Now what about confidence…?
Everyone also talks about it. I see something about confidence in every other Instagram post and every other Q & A. As much as influencers are encouraging their followers, girls still can't get enough of tips on how to be confident. We see "faith over fear" and quote about failure and being comfortable in your own skin and following your dreams and how to mingle…it all gets overwhelming and watered down. I know I may read an IG post, but quickly move on and do not think anything of it because I GET IT.
This can be why some say social media can be so bad and toxic, and sometimes it really is. There is so much being thrown at us as soon as we open that app. But I also think it is a blessing in that because we have these IG models that us girls now have to live up to, we also have bloggers like me that can continue encouraging and hopefully have the louder voice to bring out every girl's confidence.
Everyone one is different, therefore no matter how many blogs, influencers, speakers, there are out there…there is still room for one more as that one can make a difference to their niche audience and have just the right words to say to encourage and inspire a group of people.
This is something that I have been learning. Something that is currently against my confidence in writing this blog…among many many other things.
We all have something or a bunch of things. I am going to give a few general tips to bring out your inner confidence in any situation whether it be about your ability to do your job, being comfortable in your own skin, being intelligent enough, etc. (p.s. let me know what specifically is bringing your confidence down).
1. Throw on a pair of heels
Who doesn’t feel more confident in heels…and if you say you because you can't walk in them, start small and walk in them more!
2. Listen to some Carrie Underwood and Miranda Lambert
If you don't like country at leave give these girls a try, specifically this song Somethin' Bad. And if you do like country, you already know what I'm talking about. Insider info: Carrie Underwood is the whole inspiration behind CEFLV.
3. Wear your favorite outfit
Even if you are not super into fashion, when you or anyone loves the outfit you have on, it does not just make you feel more confident and like you look good, but it actually radiates in how you carry yourself and truly makes you look happier, more confident, and better looking.
4. Do more of what is bringing your confidence down
If it is makeup because you are bad at it, do more of it. If it is your weight, go to the gym more. If it is something at work, research and practice more. If it is school or your small vocabulary (I know, so small, but I've been there), study more.
5. Write down who you want to be
Journaling and writing out your feelings is beneficial to some people, and is for me sometimes, but what really helped me was writing down (just in the notes of my phone) who I want to be. This helps you figure out who you are currently, who you want to be and the difference between the two…and help you make the choice. Do you want to be the kind of person that people can open up to? Do you want to be strong? Confident? Independent? Preppy?
6. Do something that scares you
This can be really fun if you let it. I know many things scare us, but I mean some sort of activity like going over a swinging bridge or holding a snake or riding a horse. When you come out the other side and conquer it, you will feel so proud of yourself and feel your confidence level go up. "Brave people are still scared, but they do it anyway."
7. Set a short term goal
Do something by the end of the week or couple of days or 24 hours. Make it small, but not a simple daily task, so that when you accomplish it you become proud and encouraged to move forward.
Example: memorize a bible verse. Write a blog post. Go to the gym every other day.
8. Go out alone
This is scary for a lot of people both introverts and extroverts. Extroverts like to be around people, why would you want to be alone? Introverts would rather not sit alone in public, what could they be thinking?
Go for lunch by yourself at Panera or read a book at Starbucks or actually go out to a bar and have a drink. And make sure to wear your favorite outfit with heels to boost your confidence as you walk in alone.
9. Stop feeling sorry for yourself
This is similar to the idea that is going around about women apologizing too much.
Often times we do this and don’t realize it. I know I did. I was the kind of girl that let people walk all over me. I was so scared of offending people or making someone not like me. I was quiet and cared too much what others thought…and I would feel sorry for myself. I am still like that and will continue to grow from it, but use to have a "innocent girl, apologetic, I'm sorry people see you like this" type of mentality. That is not healthy. Do not apologize for your beliefs and opinions, choose to not feel sorry for yourself, and grow up and take back your confidence.
10. Get Mad
For me this looks like working out: running or boxing while listening to empowering music. It is a feeling of confidence rather than anger. But the idea behind getting mad is turning the feeling sorry for yourself into productivity and confidence.
These are a few different ideas from what is out there on the internet about gaining confidence that have worked for me. I think the biggest women we can look to for inspiration in confidence, christianity, and more are country artists. Some of my favorites are: Carrie Underwood, Maren Morris, Miranda Lambert, Reba McEntire, Martina McBride, Shania Twain, Sara Evans, and Faith Hill.